Jim Hill
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Lord knows, we could all use a laugh right about now. And usually we can count on those talented folks over at Disney Feature Animation to provide us with a belly laugh or two.

But sometimes -- strange as this may seem -- the very best jokes that have been created expressly for these cartoons don't make the big screen. Why for? Well, maybe it's because a particular bit of business -- no matter how brilliantly it's been animated or staged -- interrupts the flow of the story. Or maybe it's because a gag inadvertently destroys the mood that the film-makers were trying to create.

Normally, these gems just hit the cutting room floor -- never to been seen or heard from again. But today -- because I personally feel that we've all had our fill of sadness for a while -- I'm resurrecting some of this shtick. Showing off some inspired gags that -- over the years -- Disney animators have told me about that were just too good to forget and/or keep to myself.

So now -- without further ado -- let's make with the jokes:

Pocahontas
Most in-the-know animation fans are already aware of Redfeather, the talking turkey character that master animator Nik Ranieri had developed for this 1995 film. Redfeather, who was to have been voiced by John Candy, would have been Pocahontas' confidant and would have added some much needed comic relief to the film.

But as production got underway, it was decided that -- if "Pocahontas" was going to maintain a serious, naturalistic tone -- the film would have to be true to nature. So, seeing as no animals talk in the real world, no animals were going to be allowed to talk in this movie either.

So Redfeather lost his voice, which lead to the character jokingly being referred to as "Deadfeather." Eventually, the part of the turkey was cut entirely and all of his business was handed off to another supporting character that Ranieri had worked up: a kleptomaniac raccoon called Meeko.

But -- due to then-Disney Studio head Jeffrey Katzenberg's insistence that "Pocahontas" be a serious, thoughtful film -- even Meeko got some of his gags cut because it was thought that they might interfere with the tone of the movie. Which is a shame -- because the very best of these was an in-joke that only the most sharp eyed of Disneyana fans would have caught.

Just before the film's climax, Pocahontas has returned to Grandmother Willow to tell the wise old tree of John Smith's plight. Thinking that it might make his friend feel better in this desperate hour, Meeko scrambles up into his den. The raccoon then digs around, desperately searching for the compass he had stolen from Smith earlier in the film.

That is how the scene appears in the film today. But -- as originally written -- there would have been one truly unique treasure stashed to the back of Meeko's den: The Genie's lamp from "Aladdin."

Though the lamp was to have been carefully placed toward the back of Meeko's den, barely visible to the movie's audience, "Pocahontas" producers still cut this in-joke very early in the film's production. Why? Because while everyone appreciated this sly little tribute to an earlier Disney film, the film-makers still insisted that nothing -- no matter how trivial -- be added to "Pocahontas" that could take away from the film's serious tone.

The Little Mermaid
Of course, the producers of "Pocahontas" weren't the first folks to cut a proposed in-joke from a Disney animated film just because they were afraid that it would ruin a moment in a movie. The production team for "The Little Mermaid" had proposed an in-joke that would have appeared on screen for only a 10th of a second. Even so, Disney executives still made them cut the gag out.

This joke would have appeared near the end of Ursula's big number, "Poor Unfortunate Souls." As the sea witch unrolled the scroll that Ariel must sign to become human, the camera quickly flies over the fine print. None of the writing on the contract is very distinct.

That's how the scene appears in the finished film. But -- were one to view this same short scene on one of those highly illegal work-in-progress versions of "The Little Mermaid" that are floating around out there -- one would see something quite amusing. Going frame by frame as the camera rolls down the scroll, one would eventually see a series of arcane symbols on the contract. These symbols included a hand gun being pointed directly at Mickey Mouse's head.

Given that the writers/directors of "The Little Mermaid," John Musker & Ron Clements, are notorious for stashing in-jokes in their movies (See "The Great Mouse Detective," "Aladdin" and/or "Hercules" for proof), it's quite likely that these guys were the two pranksters who tried to slip this obviously anti-Disney gag into the film. Unfortunately, Disney management somehow got wind of the proposed in-joke and insisted that it be dropped from the finished version of the film. (Though -- given that this gag revolved around a revolver pointed at the company's corporate symbol -- it's easy to understand why some folks might not find this particular in-joke very amusing.)