Blockbuster Bombs concludes with a costly misfire of the 1990’s. Being adapted from a Michael Crichton book and directed by John McTiernan seemed like a recipe for success. The 13th Warrior would go down in history as a Blockbuster Bomb more epic than the story it tried to tell.
The Plot
Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan (Antonio Banderas) is a diplomat from Bagdad who after falling in love with the wrong woman is sent off as an ambassador to a far away land. With his friend Melchisidek (Omar Sharif) they meet Northmen (Vikings) and fall into their company. Through Melchisidek, Ibn learns that the leader of the Northmen, Buliwyf (Vladimir Kulich) has been summoned to a distant land to help defend the kingdom from a threat.
Before he knows what is happening, the party of warriors selects Ibn to be their thirteenth, and he is alone amongst the Northmen. Cast into a strange world Ibn struggles at first to coexist with the warrior Northmen. He learns their language and starts to connect with his fellow warriors.
Ibn builds a friendship with a fellow Viking named Herger (Dennis Storhoi). When the thirteen warriors arrive at their destination, the kingdom is under siege by monsters of the mist, and Buliwyf and his men must defend the land and defeat the mysterious beings that are known as ‘The Eaters of the Dead’.
Cinematic Compliments
Antonio Banderas is a talented actor that does not get enough respect nor credit for his work. Any role he plays, Banderas brings a zest for life that is unique and passionate and always lets the audience connect with him on screen. Banderas is single handedly the best part of the film.
Cinematic Complaints
Omar Sharif is a legend. Yet this acting titan is relegated to the role of sidekick that has fifteen minutes of screen time. If a film signs Omar Sharif, then he needs to be in the movie. The movie would have benefited from his character going on the journey with Banderas. What a colossal misuse of a talented actor.
The supporting cast is filled with Scandinavian actors which fits the characters perfectly, but the talent of the supporting cast is lost in the cluttered story. I never felt invested in the success of the Vikings with Ibn, because I did not connect with the supporting actors. It did not matter to me if they lived or died.
The cluttered storyline causes so many issues for the fluidity of the picture. One can tell this is a film of two different minds. There are multiple scenes that harken back to what director McTiernan did with films like Predator and Die Hard. There were moments that felt like they were ripped from those films, and I expected to see Bruce Willis or Arnold Schwarzenegger enter the scene. The fact that the movie has two climatic endings is the biggest disappointment, which makes the epic battle in the cave pointless.
We never know what the reasoning is for the Wendol (the bad guys) to attack the Vikings. At one point the Wendol are regarded as the Monsters of the Mist and were thought to be gone or extinct. Yet when they attack the Viking settlement, we see there are hundreds if not thousands of Wendol warriors. Why would the Vikings think the Wendol were ever gone?
While the excessive violence in the film matches up with the brutality of the times, the beheading and cannibalism was unnecessary and needlessly gruesome. From the consumption of human beings to the Vikings cleaning their nostrils and then using this pot of water to wash up, there are a lot of questionable moments displayed in this movie, which helps to derail the story and the talented actors. Thankfully, we were spared the brutality of the Viking funeral.
Fun Film Facts
- The film is based on Michael Crichton’s book Eaters of the Dead published in 1976.
- In the book, the Wendol are revealed to be some distant relative of Neanderthal man.
- A Viking ship used in the film ended up at the Norway pavilion in Epcot.
- Producers of the film downplay the supposed astronomical budget of $160 million. The budget that the production company likes to quote is in the realm of $90 million.
- The film was originally titled Eaters of the Dead and set for release in 1998, but test audiences skewered the film, and the movie was retooled with reshoots directed by Michael Crichton. Crichton as producer on the film took over for original director John McTiernan.
- Crichton dumped the original composer Graeme Revell and replaced him with Jerry Goldsmith and a new score.
- Crichton also changed the Wendol witch mother who was originally portrayed by an older actor, for someone younger. The idea of Buliwyf attacking an older woman didn’t go over well with the test audiences.
- The film may have been a Viking tale but it was filmed in British Columbia, Canada.
- In McTiernan’s cut of the film, there is reportedly no final battle between Buliwyf and the leader of the Wendol.
- The cave scenes were filmed on a production stage in Vancouver.
- Omar Sharif was so disappointed by his role in the film that he reportedly went into semi- retirement after the movie came out.
The Golden Popcorn Bucket Award
The 13th Warrior gets a ½ Golden Popcorn Bucket Award. Talented actors tried their best, but the story was difficult to transfer to the screen, and costly reshoots and different directors can derail a film’s narrative.
Having read Eaters of the Dead prior to watching the film, I can safely say this was one Michael Crichton story that should have stayed a book.
Coming Attractions
The summer is here and it’s time to dive into Spike Lee’s Summer of Sam.
Production Credits
Directed by John McTiernan (Michael Crichton directed the reshoots)
Produced by Touchstone Pictures
Starring:
- Antonio Banderas as Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan
- Omar Sharif as Melchisidek
- Diane Venora as Queen Weilew
- Vladimir Kulich as Buliwyf
- Dennis Storhoi as Herger
Release Date: August 27, 1999
Budget: $160 million
Box Office Gross
Domestic: $32,698,899
Worldwide Total: $61,698,899