With an absolutely heinous 5am wake-up call horn (which may or may not be a viable HR case), the Ducks are ready to show off their skills for the first full day at EPIC. Since Coach Cole is partly a psychopath, every camper will be seen as an individual thanks to performance wristbands. A calculation of their skills is plastered on a screen in the middle of the center, allowing the kids to see everyone as competition. This seems like a great use of funds and a wonderfully cutthroat experience for tweens!
EPIC utilizes center time, but not in a fun-lets-play-with-silly-putty way. Instead, the kids are put through the ringer. VR Hockey simulations force them to weigh every possible option from their on ice choices. Strength and conditioning helps them gain stamina for the game, while also being a lesson in traumatic life-saving skills. Coach Rufus teaches a nutrition class where he throws away perfectly good pizza and instead gives them an HerbalLife seminar. It’s quite a lot, especially for Nick.
As he clearly established in the premiere, this is not the place for him. He doesn’t enjoy the rigorous nature of the center, he just wants to spend time with his friends and enjoy playing hockey in a calmer environment. This is summer camp, why should someone take away pizza from his life? Why would anyone take away pizza ever?!
The day culminates in a “Dead Man’s Run,” where all the campers do a lengthy run to…I dunno, boost morale? Nick quickly gets lost, but then decides to run away. He’s absolutely over the ordeal and is ready to hang up his skates. Evan seems distant in Nick’s eyes and none of the coaches are seeing the craziness of their ways, so Nick says adios and keeps running up that hill, all the way to a Hilton Garden Inn. (Sure, product placement. Sure.)
Alex frantically finds him as he reveals how he’s scared and broken down. She argues that Nick should return because he’s scared, but she is adamant about not forcing him to make that decision.
In the end, Nick decides to return and the EPIC journey continues. What will tomorrow bring? Probably some menthol muscle rub and a few Advil.
Penalty Box Thoughts:
- I have to say, I am not on Alex’s side here. This place feels like a frat gone bad, with hazing being deemed as “athletic achievement.” Why push through something so painful that you do not enjoy? Alex confronting Coach Cole about creating “hockey killers” proves my point entirely.
- Alex plays the guitar? Jace is sick of his dad? Alex and Jace chat about how much they hate Cole? Ah, that’s history.
- Stephnie Weir coming in with the quote of the episode: “I’m drafting a press release in case things don’t go our way. What did Nick love?”
- An entire plot point focuses on warm cookies being handed out at check-in of the Garden Inn…but isn’t that not true? Doubletree is the premiere cookie-based hotel chain. Why lie about cookies, Mighty Ducks!?