[rolls out conspiracy theory board filled with red string] So, The Anaheim Ducks were named after a ragtag group of kids, the original Coach Bombay Mighty Ducks in the universe of the show. There was never a movie, the powers that be just happened to know about some preteens playing hockey and decided to have an actual team in the NHL carry their name. Then, because of the choice in name, there is an exhibit in the locker room dedicated to the history of these tweens competing, including a sacred knuckle puck used in the past.
Matt Rogers of Las Culturistas frequently mentions how the writers of The Morning Show are “a group of third graders” because of the wackadoo plot lines they have created during the show’s second season. I think it’s time to admit we have another classroom full of third graders on our hands.
Before we get to the field trip, let’s quickly touch base with Evan. He is in a regretful mood after alienating himself from his family of Ducks after the non-dominant-hand incident from last week. Nick decides to give him a best friend pep talk that can be best summed up as “You keep messing up and, frankly, you’re too far gone, so why not go all in?” It was supportive in the same way you have to be supportive watching a friend’s play, even though it’s awful.
Evan decides to go all-in and fight to become the team captain for Dominate. Why not completely rid yourself of any semblance of what made you who you are? Screw the Ducks. Dominate or bust, baby! AJ is toxically appalled, because duh. The duo end up competing in a stamina test, seeing who can last in an ice bath the longest. Evan wins. Huzzah?
Meanwhile, The Mighty Ducks head to the Anaheim Arena to have a talk with the coach of the actual Ducks [continues connecting red string] as the greatest form of a pep talk possible. Unfortunately, he’s not available. Thus, the moping begins. Alex tries to sneak her way into finding the coach within the stadium, but to no avail.
Luckily, a 4th tier big-wig for the Ducks (“An assistant to the assistant”) is able to give the inspirational speech Alex needs to push her into returning to the team stronger than ever. She returns with the knuckle puck as a concept. How can every member of the team create their own unexpected moment to lead them to victory? Koob is scoring, the Smash Siblings are being created, and Sofi is turning pucks on their side. The assistant squared brings in some actual Duck players at the last moment for some painfully delivered lines and on-the-ice action. Will this bring the team the success they so desperately deserve? Of course it will, but I wonder how many episodes it will take to see it come to fruition?
Penalty Box Thoughts:
- Jace and Sofi kiss. Sofi nominates Jace for team captain. Jace becomes captain. Alex shows Cole that Jace is captain. Cole kisses Alex. These third graders are wildin’!
- Stephnie Weir remains the only shred of comedy this season has to offer. I don’t know why they haven’t let Alex have as many funny moment this year, but I’m beyond grateful Weir is here!