Uh oh. It only took three episodes, but we’ve just received an unequivocal stinker of an episode. While Plastic Surgery Week may bring conflicting ideas on the industry at large, those conversations are pushed to the side in order to fill 42 minutes with gobbledegook.
As the recovering surgery subjects board, the crew is divided between mocking the new passengers (Trevor and the Captain) and hating the larger idea of body dysmorphia (Avery). We’re quickly introduced to GINA GERSHON, who holds the yearly cruise as the wife of the owner of The Odyssey and a stern supporter of the facial arts. The human Ken doll also boards, much to the fascination of Dr. Bankman.
We quickly learn that during Bankman’s COVID state, he wanted to get his mind off of the bad surrounding him, so he turned to “trashy” reality TV. That led him to watching the reality show following the eponymous Ken. The pair immediately connect, with Bankman awestruck at Ken’s commitment to his own truth, a bizarre take within an episode that can’t decide on its own tone. After the two bond during a cryo bonding session, Ken later returns with fear over possible sepsis from his most recent surgery. Unfortunately, after a wildly long montage that felt like filler (no pun intended), Ken succumbs to the sepsis and dies.
Yet, death and The Odyssey don’t mix. When death creeps into the illusion of cruising, the plywood and paste fall down to reveal real life. That can’t happen. So, Ken’s body is placed inside of a decoy towel cart and brought to the onboard flower freezer, which becomes a makeshift morgue in emergencies. Avery explains how in these events, they give out free flowers to guests in order to free up space. Dr. Bankman is stunned at the flippancy of death on board, but reader, I gasped at the accuracy. (The ongoing “rumor” states that when more ice cream is made available to guests, that means someone has passed and they needed freezer space. It was the truest cruising plotline to date.)
After Ken’s passing, we pretty much ignore that immediately. Guy’s dead, want some flowers? Wild, y’all. Instead, we have to worry about Trevor’s relationship with his mother, who surprises him on board as she’s recovering from a facelift. They clearly have a fraught relationship, so when good ‘ole mommy collapses after a difficult conversation between Trevor and her, tensions are high. She seems to be fine once she awakes in the medical space, but Dr. Bankman feels like more is at play. Come to find out, she is diagnosed with Huntington’s disease. Yes, within the span of a single cruise, a man dies of sepsis and a woman is diagnosed with an incurable neurological disease. Is this boat…cursed? It’s giving Meredith-Grey-can’t-catch-a-break energy.
Trevor comforts his mother, while she commits to being a more present mother in her limited time left on Earth. But like, then she finds a good deal on carpets for her home and skedaddles faster than you can say “May I have a look at your wine list?” Trevor is devastated, but life goes on and the show barrels on. Nothing has any emotional weight this episode and it is sending me.
Avery and GINA GERSHON are in the midst of their yearly tiff over the ridiculousness of Plastic Surgery Week, and after many a tense exchange, GERSHON threatens to fire Avery. Later, a woman who has given herself frostbite after soaking her breasts post-surgery in ice has a large infection that needs to be taken care of. Avery offers a larger procedure (that can 100% not happen on a ship) to remove the damaged and infected tissue, much to the chagrin of GERSHON, who hates Avery, but still wants her personal shopper to stay alive.
The surgery goes swimmingly, GERSHON revokes the threat of firing and confirms that she’ll give a recommendation for Avery’s medical scholarship. Oh, and for no reason at all, a girl’s nose falls off after she does a line of coke.
Captain’s Orders:
- Does Don Johnson have a screen time limit? My guess is he clocked in about 5 minutes total this episode. I mean, no judgment, take the paycheck, but why bother?
- This episode featured two extended montages of men looking longingly for inconclusive reasons.
- Trevor heads to a beachfront restaurant to meet up with his mom, but before he got stood up, I couldn’t help but notice how absolutely insane the space looked. I mean, it’s a weekly show on network television, but was the production budget really that low?
- The love triangle seems to now solely be Dr. Massey and Avery, as Tristan succumbs to defeat.
- Tristan’s mom really said “I’m gonna die and need to be with you–wait, jk, found a sale, byeeeeeee.”
- In the final scene, Ken’s friends come to retrieve the body with no sense of sadness about his death. It’s some uncanny valley realness that I couldn’t handle.
- “Ken” is a real person who really had these surgeries, but dies on the show, but is still living? That’s like having Michael Douglas guest star on ER as Michael Douglas, then promptly killing Michael Douglas. Unhinged behavior.