We find our protagonist Sam working hard at Giovanni’s when suddenly she’s surrounded by grocery carts of alcohol and an abundance of green. Manager Mindy walks over with green hair and it becomes clear: It’s St. Patrick’s Day or as Mindy calls it, “The Purge for sober people.”
A discouraged looking Sam Facetimes her sponsor, Olivia, on her break. Olivia and her wife, Stephanie are packing their car for a trip to the Cape and their “last hurrah” for their baby. “I feel like the only Jewish kid in town on Christmas… which I was,” Sam expresses. As Olivia continues packing, she drops some advice for Sam’s difficult day ahead: Don’t be alone, don’t go on Instagram, and go to a meeting if you need to. Olivia tells Sam she can join them on their trip, but Sam declines the offer, most likely hearing Stephanie’s annoyance. Olivia tells Sam to call her if she needs to talk to someone and again, Stephanie seems a bit fatigued by her wife’s role as a sponsor.
Although she has a few more minutes on her break, Mindy humbles Sam as she tells her there’s a festively green pile of vomit ready for her to clean-up.
Sam needs to find a friend to hangout with on this difficult day. She starts her journey by visiting Felicia at work in the salon. Felicia appreciates the offer and sympathizes with Sam’s “journey,” but reminds her friend that St. Patrick's Day is the holiday of “her people” and her “Super Bowl.”
Back at Giovanni’s, Mindy is still rocking the green hair as James walks down the aisle. He’s locked out of his apartment and his roommates are trying to get him to come to the bar to pick up a spare set of keys. “You never hangout anymore!” They text him. Mindy offers her companionship and says she’ll go with James to get his keys.
Segueing into the Finch household, Bob attempts to explain to Carol and Sam that Polish folks have been referred to as “the Irish of the East” which seemingly only makes this moment harder for our central character. It’s the last thing Sam wants to do on this day, but she asks the budding new couple to hangout. Her mother expresses a brief (maybe sincere?) thank you, but asks for “a raincheck” because they have tickets to an Irish band. This was a tough scene as Sam finds herself staring at two exposed and not-empty champagne glasses; some great imagery to denote the lack of sensitivity around her vulnerability on this day.
Sam goes to the kitchen. Despite her best efforts to follow her sponsor’s advice, she is alone and she needs to find something to do. Queue the baking set-up montage! But, hold up… Sam realizes the cookies are premade. This activity now only takes up 15 minutes of this endless day and Sam starts to get restless. Now, what? Another last resort: A Scottie Pippin narrated meditation. “Don’t you feel chill already?” He asks. Sam does not.
Unable to listen another minute, she goes on Instagram against Olivia’s warning (sensing a trend here…) and sees Felicia living her best Paddy Day life. If that’s not triggering enough, the next story features Brit’s bridal party showing her off in a dress shop. Yet, Sam doesn’t crumble. She sends a direct message to Brit and asks her why she’s wearing lace when she hates it. In a turn of events, this is the exact message Brit needs to hear at the bridal shop. She’s not satisfied with the dress, but the shop manager is gaslighting her into thinking it’s perfect, “Somehow you just know.” Brit’s friends are too intoxicated to sense her hesitancy and instead, go along with the store manager. She messages back to Sam, “I need your help.”
Sober Sam to the rescue! Sam leaps up from her day of nothing and runs to her ex-bestie’s fashion emergency.
Mindy and James, on the other hand, have their own emergency going on: walking the green and mean streets of St.Patrick’s Day crowds as two sober folks. Mindy opens up about one of her tactics to stay sober; treating every day like a quest in the video game. She started using this method when she began transitioning as a way to cope when things got heavy, and it’s helped her ever since. As a gamer himself, James very quickly jumps into defense mode as the pair are offered a shot on the street: “Sword of sobriety!”
Sam arrives at the bridal shop to some tipsy bridesmaids. The store manager isn’t thrilled about the newest addition to the bride crew and says that she’s sick of their company on this holiday. However, Sam holds down the fort and begins to pick out some dresses.
The manager hands Sam a glass of champagne, but Sober Sam follows the arm’s length rule throughout the entire exchange. Brit walks out in the prettiest dress we’ve seen yet and for the first time, she’s less disgusted by the gown. Still, Sam’s friend-instinct kicks in: “Maybe you’re not a dress person.” She reminds Brit of the time she wore a pantsuit and looked like Michelle Obama and suggests that route as an option for the Harvard alum, “Wear whatever the hell you want to your wedding.” Brit is moved and grateful for Sam, but the moment doesn’t last long as the manager kicks the group out of the store. She’s a Flannigan and she’s over missing St. Patrick’s Day.
Bob and Carol arrive back home, looking tipsy from their holiday festivities. Bob wonders if they should go to bed since the house is empty, but Carol is nervous. She hasn’t been with anyone since her late husband, so Bob asks her what will make her more comfortable. “Make me thirty years younger,” she tears up. Her boyfriend assures her that he wants the version of her that she sees before him, but tells her they can take their time.
Entering in a sea of drunkenly green people, Mindy and James find his roommates in the bar. Mindy iconically introduces herself as James’ fiancée and the pair try to get the keys for a quick exit. James’ roommates won’t have it and instead, challenge them to play for it in a game of beer pong (famously a terrible game for recovering alcoholics). Mindy encourages James not to worry -“This is the final boss battle” – and sinks the first shot in. Their objective: Get the keys and throw the drinks on the ground.
Back with the makeshift bridal crew, the tipsy bridesmaids start their separate journeys home. Sam meets up with the bride to check-in about her dress choice, but they both know the options were all equally rough. She continues to offer herself as a pair of extra eyes for Brit’s next fitting. Brit says thank you, but walks away, keeping her distance.
Sam goes to get coffee and bumps into Mindy and James, “I didn’t realize you two were hangout-friends.” Perhaps they didn’t start the day that way, but now that is true. As Sam sits down, viewers witness a trio begin to flourish. Sam gets a video from Felicia from the pits of Paddy’s Day with a message of pride from a crowd of non-sober folks, “Don’t come here!” James raises his glass of water for a toast, “There’s barf flowing in the streets and none of it is ours.”
This week marked a huge turning point for Sam, including a successfully sober holiday, a potential reconnection with an old friend, and a couple of new ones, too.
Tune into “Single Drunk Female” on Thursdays at 10:30p on Freeform and on Hulu the next day.